Going back to study: making the leap into a master’s degree at 34
/May, 2020: I’d been back at work a couple of months, and was working from home in the midst of the Covid lockdown. I knew I wanted to be doing something different, work-wise; and I wanted to be working in health but in a government or policy-focused role. I was already working in the health sector, but wasn’t sure how to get the experience that everyone always asks for on their job ads. And I didn’t even know if it was something I’d enjoy.
It’s pretty common, this whole questioning of your career when you’re in your thirties or forties. How do you make a move into something different? I’d already started researching different qualifications online, and was doing some careers counselling over the phone. I kept circling back to a qualification at Victoria University, the Master of Health – specialising in Policy, Planning, and Service Delivery, which sounded like all the things I was interested in.
Like any good post-grad student, I did my research: I spoke with the Head of School (while pushing my toddler around the supermarket), and a lecturer, about how much time I could expect to spend per week on course work. I found out how much study leave I could get from work, and re-acquainted myself with StudyLink and the student loan process (believe me, the processes had not changed since 13 years earlier, and giving them a new surname almost broke the internet). I had to really ask myself: could I fit the approximate twenty hours a week of course work into my life? Once I had a clearer idea about how I’d do this – by spending about 2.5 hours a day during the week on study, and a few hours on the weekend on it, it all became clearer: it was possible to go back to uni, even with work and a 1 year old. It still required a big leap of faith that I could do it. But I was bored and in need of a change career-wise; wanting to stretch my mind instead of becoming stagnant. I knew it was going to be hard and that I’d be tired mentally and physically at times, fitting it around work and family-life. And I was definitely, definitely going to need other people’s support (mostly my husband’s) to get it done.
Eighteen months ago, I began the degree, and straight away there were challenges: we were in the midst of winter daycare bugs. I read papers and outlined an essay while sitting in the emergency department for 7 hours, waiting to get steroids for asthma. But what I was learning – how to research a health topic, write a literature review and a research proposal, what cost-benefit analysis techniques were – was so fascinating to me that I somehow kept going, through terrible colds and stomach bugs, and a few job applications on the side.
This year, in 2021, things have got a little bit easier. There’s been less illness, and a new job where I can apply what I’m learning in a government context – in education, rather than health, but there is a lot of cross-over. I feel like I’m on the right path. It’s still been draining at times. When I was doing two papers at the same time, I often had to read whenever I had a chance: on the train in the morning and the evening, and at lunchtime, in around work. Then as soon as my toddler was in bed I was firing up the laptop for a solid couple of hours of work.
I’ve been able to read around forty papers on endometriosis and people’s experiences of it – my favourite research topic, because it encompasses women’s health, a health condition I experience and that several friends and acquaintances have, and an under-researched area of health, especially in New Zealand. This is what I plan on doing my final research paper on (it’s a taught Master’s, so the degree is made up of a mini research project and other papers).
In May this year, about a year after first enrolling in the Master’s, I had a new battle on my hands: morning sickness and fatigue, while sitting in classrooms doing block courses and while completing assignments. God, it was awful. But I was determined to keep studying and finish the Post-Graduate Diploma, so that I’d only have one paper left to do when the baby came along. The thing with studying when you’re a parent is that you just do things fast: You don’t piss around when you know you want to spend the afternoon with your child(ren). You sometimes do the work when you don’t want to do it, such as on Saturday nights, but you do your best to fit it in. People will love to tell you that you can’t possibly study, parent and work (or even just, you know, parent and work) but you can.
I had a relaxing one month off in June, before starting the last paper of the year. It was blissful not having any impending deadlines or study to do and reiterated the importance of taking breaks when I can.
In July, one of my lecturers put my name forward to be part of a photo shoot for the Health department’s marketing. The photo shoot was plagued by issues, which illustrates quite well the microcosm of challenges of completing this degree. First, I got sick so had to postpone. We re-set the date, and I knew I’d need to shoot down from work on my lunchbreak so I told the photographer I only had an hour and a half (they wanted two hours). The night before the photo shoot, Ruben completely abandoned his cot, jumping over the side and injuring himself – so we had to turn it into a bed. Guess how much sleep I had? About four hours of broken sleep, straight after having RSV virus. I then went back to work and the photo shoot I’d committed to, posing alongside another student in my class, a glam-looking Generation Z’er. I decided to embrace the craziness, liquid concealer and the free hot drink that the Marketing department bought us from Vic Books.
It’s a funny moment to look back on. I’m proud of the moments of perseverance, thankful for the support that allowed it to happen, and the connections I was able to make between what I was learning and my job. Next year, I’ll start my final research paper and steadily work through it part-time. No doubt, the challenges of children and illness and then for the last bit, work, will abound, but we’ll find a way to make it happen.
